Here is our audio version of ‘Signs of a healthy and happy relationship’ (3 minutes) the extended article is below.
Every relationship differs and is totally unique, however there seems to be some definite patterns emerging when sustaining a strong relationship…
Allowing yourself space
Just because you’re a couple really does not mean you have to spend every waking moment together. You were a person before you met, with interests and dreams, why would those fade? Pursuing your own interests and friendships keeps your relationship sparky, you have other things to talk about whilst keeping your independence.
Having a voice
Express yourself freely within your relationship is so important, which scarily means that no topic is ‘off-limits’, and you are both feel entirely heard and valued.
You’re human and you argue
Arguments are very normal, especially if you are doing all the points mentioned previously, and oddly if you aren’t bickering there is a high chance that you could be holding back. People who are secure and feel that their relationship is a healthy one generally do have disagreements which are discussed fairly, presenting both sides of the argument - like a much nicer courtroom. A lot of this is understanding a respecting each others differences (even if you think you are always in the right) you need to listen, learn and grow!
You actually like each other
Ok, sounds obvious but it’s the fundamental bolt-hold keeping you together. You need to try and stay present and want to be with your partner in the here and now, and not the person (you might hope) they one day become…
Joint decision making
You are firm equals, one of you in not more important than the other therefore every decision needs to work in tandem. These could range from food preferences, to the want of having children. If there is a dominant decision maker that won’t bode well for the future, and could affect the non-decision maker’s confidence.
You smile and laugh
Surely every happy and healthy relationship has ample amounts of fun? This doesn’t mean you spend your lifetime in convulsive fits of laughter, but that you find the joy in the little things, this could be making dinner, finding the same things funny, or the classic... finishing each others’ sentences.
Sex is obviously a key and important part of healthy relationships, but do not forget that it is only one part, and it is not the same as intimacy. Intimacy focuses less on the physical satisfaction and more around the bonding, and familiarity aspects. If you’re in a healthy relationship, you’ll feel connected in all of these ways.
Take a look at this handy little guide: